Why Would the Government Keep the Discovery of Bigfoot Secret?

Deep in mountain forests around the world, there may roam a mysterious creature, the sasquatch or Bigfoot. Some say it is real...others, false. False evidence of Bigfoot abounds through videos made of Bigfoot sightings. Stories are all we have left of any real, concrete evidence of this mythical forest creature.

This raises the question: If Bigfoot is real, why would the evidence be suppressed?

It is completely feasible that if Bigfoot's existence was verified, people would be afraid to go camping in the woods. This fear might spread from areas that have had Bigfoot sightings to any wooded place.The fear would come mainly from the lack of knowledge about the Bigfoot creature.

While deer walking around your campsite at night is cute, having Bigfoot strolling around could be terrifying strictly because we don't know what he or she eats. What if he or she isn't interested in the hot dogs...but is interested in our toes?

However, there are potentially thousands of people who would be interested in actually seeing (or studying) the sasquatch.... Of course! They must have done a study balancing the amount of potential tourism generated against the amount of potential/known tourism lost and decided to keep the secret. So....perhaps....

It is possible the existence of Bigfoot has been hushed up for other reasons. Here are just a possible few to ponder:

• Bigfoot is the result of a government experiment gone wrong. Perhaps gorilla DNA and human DNA were mixed to make a super top-secret weapon...that turned out to be pretty peaceful. Somehow the creature got out and wasn't able to be captured. Or perhaps several got out and started reproducing and now there are too many to capture.
• Bigfoot is really an alien from another planet. The government knows and has studied whatever living or dead specimens they can get their hands on. The information is kept secret because of the potential mass hysteria that would ensue if life in outer space was confirmed. Perhaps Bigfoot's spaceship landed in Area 51, which is why that area is so restricted.
• Maybe the Bigfoot myth was been propogated to distract us from something else...I'm just not quite sure what that something else is yet...

Or....

Perhaps Bigfoot is the missing link in the evolution of humanity. We know our DNA is very close to chimpanzees. But how did humans make the leap from being a cute little chimp to the brainiac's we are today?

This requires some more 'factual' examination (alright, there are no facts involved, only myth):

• Bigfoot is always pictured as hairy. Chimps are hairy all over. We have very fine hair all over, with denses patches here and there.
• Bigfoot walks upright. Humans walk upright. Chimps can't walk upright without assistance.
• Bigfoot sightings have occurred on several continents: North America, Asia and Australia.

Hmmmm....

It is possible that Bigfoot is just a mullet gone bad. Or perhaps all Bigfoot creatures are people hiding from the rest of the world because they got teased for having a mullet. They shunned society for so long that their clothes disintegrated, and they grew copious body hair to stay warm. (Hey, it could happen!)

It may be possible that the government doesn't want to spoil our fun and reveal the answer to the question about Bigfoot's existence. They may be really enjoying listening to all the stories people come up with about Bigfoot and having a laugh watching the videos people make 'proving' Bigfoot exists. In this case, instead of protecting us from the pain of truth about Santa Claus, they are protecting us from the pain of losing a fun pastime. We should really thank them.

Do you have a Bigfoot story to share? Write about it!

NOTE: No Bigfoot creatures were spotted during the writing of this article. There was this mullett, though...